Saturday, March 14, 2009

You Lie, Liar

Sometimes I lie to my pods. Sometimes they will ask me things like, "Mom, can you help me with this level in my game?" I reply, "I'm sorry, honey, I just don't know that much about video games." Okay. The game was made for ten year olds. If I can figure out how to wire a new bedroom or read Dickens or keep children who enjoy jumping off of the garage roof alive, I am sure I could figure out a few tips to give the poor, stuck creature. But, since I am the Mothership, it is my prerogative to lie now and again.

I thought, for years, that I would never get to drink Squirt because my dad always told me that I could have one "when you are a dad."

Sometimes I will tell them, "I don't think I have all of the ingredients" when they ask to make an especially arduous dish. Sometimes I just divert, "You'll have to ask your dad how to do that." Why do I lie? I do because the ding dang kids will not abide by the mother's end-of-conversation word "because."

A fib now and then frees up a lot of time. Plus, I just get sick of explaining every doggone reason for every doggone decision.

Let me hear an Amen!


  1. Amen! My kids have learned to laugh & walk away when I say, "Because I'm the mom, that's why!" I think I've just been lucky so far because that won't work forever.

  2. Amen here too! Teagan is 4 1/2....he asks me what every word means...ALL DAY LONG! And also asks if certain words are good words or bad words....yes, my 4 year old son has said more swear words than I ever have in my life....but just asking if they are good or bad. And I'll do the fib thing on occasion...but sometimes I catch myself and will only tell a half truth...I guess that's not any better.

  3. Amen! That's all I've got to say. Amen!

  4. Why can't we my house is always answered with a singsong chant of "Because I'm...." then they finish it with "the meanest old mom in the whole wide world!"

    Well, it's a lie most of the time! I must say, though I even do it to my husband...I pull out a strand of my hair, twist it around my finger, dig my toe in the ground, smack my gum, and say "like, I just can't figure out like, how to get the oil changed" flutter everytime. I've never changed the oil or a tire. (:

    You have captured much truth in this lying blog!