My life has only gotten more complicated since I began this blog nearly three years ago. But the last few months have been really stressful/busy with the sale of one home and the trying to find another, and the beginning of a pregnancy and the end of a season of our lives. I didn't want to share it with you because I thought it sounded boring. For the past couple of weeks, I have been re-thinking my blogging; why, when and how I blog are all questions I needed to re-evaluate. Here is what I decided:
- I'm not going to quit because it is good therapy for me and it's nice to reach out to others all across the globe who are in a similar battle. I have missed you and want to resume my blogging regularity, but I will change a few things.
- I am a religious girl. I have tried not to blog about too much in the way of religious things. I know we all have different beliefs, I don't want to sound preachy and sacred things are too close to me to risk the chance of being mocked. However, it is too much a part of me to not write about it anymore. I'm pretty sure I can write about epiphanies I've had or things I've noticed or just things that happen at church without sounding like I'm trying to shove anything down your throat.
- I am expecting our sixth baby. (Crazy Tom called the other day and asked if I was "preggers" again. Preggers and prego are both terms I hate when describing my being in the family way. I think it's crass and irritating and there are much more beautiful ways to put it. So Crazy Tom's introduction rubbed me the wrong way from the beginning. When I confirmed the fact that a new baby was to join our family, he just hmmmed. I reminded him, "You are supposed to say, 'Congratulations,' Tom." He said, "Well, I would congratulate you, but I am a zero populationist." Good grief. His mother would be horrified at his lack of tact and decorum. I wasn't too phased by the old man, though. I've been his neighbor for six years now and am familiar with his way of communicating. I just shot back, "Well, the way I see it, we need to raise up a new tax base to help with all the bills you are racking up down at the Veteran's Administration." No, I do not begrudge any money spent on our Vets, it's just that none of his health problems are a result of his service. They are all due to his poor lifestyle . . . and he knows it. He changed the subject.) Anyway, yes. There is a baby coming. I get sick of hearing about other people's pregnancies; their constantly changing cravings; their every bump and tick and ache and sore; and mostly their whining. I have wanted to write some thoughts about the pregnancy, but didn't want to sound like that. But, I'm not going to sensor myself in that way anymore. I love being with child. It is a beautiful thing and I am blessed to be participating in creation once again. If I want to write about it, I will.
- My camera is broken again. I think my five year old jumped off of the bunk bed onto it while the zoom lens was open. She won't admit to it, but that is the scenario that I've been able to reconstruct based on bits of evidence. I hesitate to write blog posts without a picture because I like to look at pictures when I read other people's blog posts. But, if I don't have a picture, I don't want that to make me avoid writing the story. There might be a few picture-less posts in the near future. Please forgive me.
- Selling and buying a house is full of good news, bad news and waiting. I didn't think you wanted to go on the journey with me, but I'm going to start sharing it. You don't have to be interested, but for as many people out there who are on the same journey, it might be nice to commiserate together.
I can't remember some of my other points, but you should know that it is 3:47 a.m. and my mind isn't completely working. I got up to use the bathroom at 2:05 and discovered that the child who was supposed to load the dinner dishes and start the dishwasher, didn't. We only have seven plates and seven bowls and if the dishwasher isn't run daily, we don't have dishes the next day. So, I loaded and started the dishwasher which meant I had to turn on the light which meant I saw the cereal which meant I was suddenly famished. Look, I'm nearly halfway through my pregnancy and I still have forty pounds to gain so I gotta get on it! I poured myself the cereal and sat down at the computer to pass the time.
And so, my friends, I am back and vow to be there when you check your blogs. It may not be what you want to read, but, then, it just might.