By allowing our son to live away from us to pursue his ballet dreams, we are ridiculed on every side. As if this weren't challenging enough, and as if we didn't question and wonder and hope continually about our decision, we get the added burden of explaining ourselves
You let your child go down the slide by himself? You are letting her walk to the movie theater alone? You think you are smart enough to home school? Your husband is going to college even though you have . . . how many kids? You want to have more children? You let your eight year old cook--with a stove and everything? You let her climb the tree, read Hunger Games, and use power tools? You are living in a 40 year old single-wide? And now, you let your son dance ballet . . . in another city?
Then, it comes . . .
I would never do it.
It is pretty much the ultimate insult. People say that to me a lot; probably without really thinking about what they are saying.
I would never do it. = You are a fool because you are doing it.
Honestly, it is one of the most painful experiences for me to have people I love express their judgement in this way. I'm sure you wouldn't necessarily want to do something that you might think was outrageous, but you don't always get to pick!
When you see someone drowning, it is usually a good idea to toss out the life saver, rather than lecture them on water safety.
Which is why your donations mean so much to me, my husband and our son. You will never know how much your generous votes of support have buoyed us. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Our boy lives away from me three weeks out of the month not because it is something we want, but because it is right. I hate it. I hate it every day. I can promise you that we want our son home more than the naysayers do. But, you know what? We have an amazing child (many of them, actually) with talents far beyond my comprehension. He will have opportunities available to him that his peers, whose parents wouldn't let stand next to the campfire, will never know. His life will not be the one I pictured, but that is only because I didn't know it was possible. And you will always get to say that you helped him get his start.
Sincerely and with the greatest appreciation,
P.S. To be fair, there are several people in my life who are loving and supportive of us as parents, even though they don't necessarily understand our decisions. You know who you are. <3