Yesterday, we were going to an amazing store downtown to shop for a kitchen door. The place's bread and butter is overstock doors and windows, but it is stuffed to the gills with cool antique building supplies and architectural details. They have 100 year old fireplace mantles, salvaged tiles, real-wood wall paneling, and gorgeous chandeliers. He has goofy stuff like a life-size troll, racks of fur coats and a giant Victoria's Secret sign.
Having been in the store before, we knew our kids would get a kick out of wandering the maze (no such a thing as aisles in there). We also knew it would be tempting to touch, handle, try out and get on/in all the cool finds.
Here is my husband at the impromptu oath ceremony.
"I solemnly swear (solemnly swear) I will not touch anything. (I will not touch anything.) I will not run off. (I will not run off.) I will not climb inside anything. (I will not climb inside anything.) I will not scream or holler or squeal (I will not scream or holler or squeal.) If I do (If I do), I hereby give permission (I hereby give permission) for my parents to spank* me (for my parents to spank me) in front of everyone. (in front of everyone.)"
Or something like that.
It was partially successful. But such a good try, Daddy!
*Just so you know, we don't spank our children and they all knew this was a joke threat. They were laughing heartily throughout the entire vow.